Mission Trip "Changed 2011" Part 2

BreAnna's Journal from Saturday, Jan. 15:

Almost to Boston; I’ve been reading “Radical” by David Platt for the second time. Not an easy book to read. I mean, it’s really convicting…every page I read I encounter this inner turmoil, a battle going on. “Do I harden my heart to what God wants me to obey or do I embrace the truths, no matter how much I have to give up?” I find myself rationalizing my life…”Hey, I AM following Jesus…come on, I’ve gone on all sorts of mission’s trips, I give a lot of my money to mission’s each month, I share Jesus with people at school when I can, I am a leader at youth group, I read the Word daily, etc.”

People say I am very surrendered to God’s will for my life. Oh yeah? Well, how come I set a line on how much material possessions I will give up to follow Jesus, in fear that He might call me to literally give it ALL up? How come I ignore God’s command to “preach the gospel in season and out of season”? How come the Jesus I have created for myself would disagree on quite a few points with the Jesus of the Bible? You know, I like where I am with Jesus … it’s fun, it’s comfortable, but it’s hard enough that I do have to trust Him and it is radical enough that other people really think I’m sold-out, abandoned for Christ. I’m not sure I want to follow Jesus if it means I leave my life, friends, family behind and share Jesus with people who have never heard of Him. But, I want that to change!

-We met the rest of the group in Amsterdam…now we are leaving Khartoum. This is the last leg of our journey. I’m almost in Ethiopia!